Saturday, September 15, 2018

Chaos in the Crowd

A crowd is chaos in my world. Anxiety and panic set in and my flight or fight kicks in, more flight than fight. After a day of grocery shopping in a crowded Wal-Mart, the unfortunate reality is, I need recovery days.

I love people. I love to talk. It just has to be on a one to one basis, text messages, or a very small group. I crave quiet. I crave peace. Living with anxiety, panic disorder, PTSD, ADD, depression makes life just a bit more interesting. Living with fibromyalgia, hypothyroidism, arthritis, along with a few other medical issues makes life a bit harder. Everyday is a new adventure.

A crowd may bring panic. A crowd may keep me behind closed doors in my home. A crowd may make me anxious. A crowd may be chaos for me but time alone in God's presence is priceless.

My mental and medical health may have changed my life and took me out of the working world, but it has given me a blessing. Time to work on myself. Time to get closer to God. Time to write.

This is part of the Five Minute Friday's link-up


Lesley said...

I'm not a fan of crowds either but it sounds like you're dealing with a lot! So important to recognise when we need that time alone, and it definitely does have advantages in making space to connect with God!

Cindy Wilkins said...

You are facing a lot of challenges but you remind us what is most important: growing closer to God. I admire your honesty and faith. Thank you for sharing, your fmf neighbor, Cindy

Jerimi said...

Oh boy, do I feel this. Even on a good day, the chaos of crowds is utterly frazzling. When I push myself to do things like participate in a craft show, I generally have to stay in bed a couple of days to let my body and mind recuperate. I love your honesty and sense of self-awareness, here. I'm really glad you shared.

MoonDove said...

It took me years to realize time alone was essential. God is good!
Thank you for stopping by!

MoonDove said...

Hi, Cindy! Thank you! I never thought the day would come when I would be able to share these things with others.

MoonDove said...

Sending hugs your way! Thank you for stopping by!